Gidgit

I am a firm believer that “doing nothing” is the most important job in the world. My favorite activity is finding a cozy spot on the bed, curling up next to my owner, and entering a deep state of professional laziness. If there’s a nap happening, you can bet I’m the project manager for it!

While other pets want to go to the park, I prefer the most exotic destination in the house: The Big Bed. It has everything a cat needs—soft blankets, great pillows, and the perfect climate for a 16-hour snooze. It’s a five-star resort, and I have a lifetime reservation.

My social media feed would be nothing but extreme sports! I’d see ads for “Parkour Kitties” jumping over massive obstacles and expert climbers scaling poles. I love watching the highlight reels of cats doing high-intensity cardio… mostly because it makes me feel even better about my own decision to stay horizontal.

I actually hand-picked my family! I started out as a stray, wandering the streets and looking for a better life. One day, I saw my mom and thought, “Yes, she looks like she has a very comfortable bed.” I followed her home that day, and I haven’t left since! I went from the sidewalk to the sofa, and it was the best career move I ever made.